"Those the Father Gave Me" - Message by Brad Jersak

Message given at Fresh Wind, Jan. 14, 2008

Scripture: John 17:6-26 [NIV]

Jesus Prays for those the Father had given him

6"I have revealed you to those whom you gave me out of the world. They were yours; you gave them to me and they have obeyed your word. 7Now they know that everything you have given me comes from you. 8For I gave them the words you gave me and they accepted them. They knew with certainty that I came from you, and they believed that you sent me. 9I pray for them. I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours.

10All I have is yours, and all you have is mine. And glory has come to me through them. 11I will remain in the world no longer, but they are still in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name—the name you gave me—so that they may be one as we are one. 12While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me. None has been lost except the one doomed to destruction so that Scripture would be fulfilled. 13"I am coming to you now, but I say these things while I am still in the world, so that they may have the full measure of my joy within them. 14I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world. 15My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. 16They are not of the world, even as I am not of it. 17Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. 18As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. 19For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified.

20"My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, 21that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me. 22I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one: 23I in them and you in me. May they be brought to complete unity to let the world know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me. 24"Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world. 25"Righteous Father, though the world does not know you, I know you, and they know that you have sent me. 26I have made you known to them, and will continue to make you known in order that the love you have for me may be in them and that I myself may be in them." 

Who has the Lord “given us”? How do we “keep them”?

When Jesus prayed his High Priestly prayer, he was less concerned with the millions we would win for him next year, but rather, for those who he had been given by the Father and those that the Father would give to us. His heart was to “keep them” and make sure that they knew the Father.

Jason Upton inspired me to think in these terms this week. When we think about who the Father has given us, who comes to mind? We include our families, we include those in our care through Bethesda and MCC, we include those in Life Recovery, we include those four pillars in our church (the disabled, the children, prodigals and the poor). These are NOT our target groups; God is. Rather, they are mentors in the kingdom. When we share things specifically about these pillars, don’t be fooled into thinking, “This is not a message for me because I am not disabled or addicted or I don’t have children.” If you EVER feel like you are having trouble giving or receiving love, come for mentoring from Harmon who gives clean and free loving hugs. If you EVER struggle with condemnation or desperately need mercy, come for mentoring from Ruthie who’s just got her recognition at the recovery house. If you EVER wish you could know that Jesus is in the room or what the angels are up to or what a “heavenly portal” is, come for mentoring from the Vooys children, who can explain all of that quite easily because they see what I do not see. 

All this to say, today as I focus on the children God has given us to keep—along with giving and receiving God’s cues from children--this message is for all of us. It is not merely for parents, but for all who want to learn to enter the kingdom like a child.

I had a very interesting 12 hours recently. I heard a series of distinct messages about what God is like and NOT like, how we represent God, with implications for what our children learn from us and what we learn from them. :

1. Midnight (when I think best): I heard the lyrics from a Dixie Chicks song ("I Hope") where they say:

Sunday morning, I heard the preacher say
Thou shall not kill
I don't wanna hear nothing else about killing
And that it's God's will

'Cause our children are watching us
They put their trust in us
They're gonna be like us
So let's learn from our history
And do it differently

2. 5:00 a.m.: (when I worry most): At some point in the night, half awake, I found myself worrying the Fresh Wind children. The Lord had clearly told our leadership team (unanimously) to “bring the children in.” For this season in our church community’s life, we would need the children with us to give us kingdom cues to follow.[1] When they need a break, the kids can head out to the hallway for a bit. But I noticed that a good number of the kids just get dismissed there and disappear—while they go and have fun together and enjoy freedom, friendship and fellowship, I was nervous, because I was pretty sure this is not what God had asked for. I felt stuck and I don't want that pillar of our church to crumble. Jesus, what do we do? Are we off track? Are we losing them? I tossed and turned over that.

3. 8:00 a.m.: Before I get out of bed, I decide to finish up a very interesting novel called "Mother Night" by Kurt Vonnegut, where I immediately read the following excerpt… again about how we represent God and how children watch and learn. The author offers his own (often ironic) advice in response to some junk-mail from a toy company.

Dear Friends: As one who has experienced extensively with life in the home and community, using real people in true-to-life situations, I doubt that any playthings could prepare a child for one millionth of what is going to hit them in the teeth, ready or not.

My own feeling is that a child should start experimenting with real people and real communities from the moment of birth, if possible. …they aren't moving hand-carved animals on and off a Noah's  Ark [toys], believe me. They are spying on real grown-ups all the time, learning what they fight about, what they're greedy for, how they satisfy their greed, why and how they lie, what makes them go crazy, the different ways they go crazy, and so on. I cannot predict the fields in which these children will succeed, but I guarantee success for them without exception, anywhere in the civilized world." (264-265)

4. 8:30 a.m.: (taking Dominic’s forgotten lunch money to school): By now, I’m noticing a pattern, a message in these songs and questions and texts. They tumble through my mind. Pondering all of this I jumped in the car, asking God what he was trying to show me. “I need help here. Explain!” He says, “Listen.” The radio, already on, shouted back at me:

You who are on the road
Must have a code that you can live by
And so become yourself
Because the past is just a good bye.

Teach your children well,
Their father's hell did slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.

Don't you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

And you, of tender years,
Can't know the fears that your elders grew by,
And so please help them with your youth,
They seek the truth before they can die.

Teach your parents well,
Their children's hell will slowly go by,
And feed them on your dreams
The one they picked, the one you'll know by.

Don't you ever ask them why, if they told you, you would cry,
So just look at them and sigh and know they love you.

(Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young - Teach Your Children)

More data. But there was also an attending feeling. A feeling of affirmation that we were indeed teaching the children well by modeling love in their presence and that as we given them freedom to watch us, and to play together, and to share their input as the Spirit leads, the message that God is love IS getting through, training adults and children alike as to what God is REALLY like.

And so I watched for confirmation. That night, one of my intercessors had a dream about our children (my own and the church-kids):

I was thinking about your Freshwind children before I fell asleep.

There were these children who had stayed in my house overnight--three were brothers with red hair--their hair was quite long for boys these days, approaching the Rastafarian look. There were two or three others as well. I recognized that the three brothers belonged to you and Eden (I don't know if they were your birth sons). I recognized too that you and Eden had each been called to preach to different groups of people and that was why the boys were visiting at my house.

It was morning and they had just gotten up, they knew exactly what they were doing and where they were going (to the university) and were rushing to get started. I needed a moment of quiet to think so I went to the basement and sat on the stairs to collect my thoughts. While I sat I found myself singing quietly the new version of Amazing Grace. A moment later one of your sons started playing the same song on the piano, on the floor above me.

I went upstairs to see what I could do to help them with food and transportation because they knew what they were doing and where they were going.  They didn't need anything from me.

While I looked at them I recognized these things about them: although they were in competition with each other they were each determined, independent, strong minded (good way) and inside of each of them the word "conform" had absolutely no place.

At one point in the dream I was listening to a message on tape - could have been you preaching. The message got louder and louder and I was trying to find the volume and turn it down ... What started coming out of the tape was like the roaring of a lion. I recognized that the Holy Spirit was powerfully present and at work - that was what the noise was about.

I recognized as well that these children who had stayed over were in no way harmed by the calling on your life, in fact God had been infusing them with strength, passion, determination and more - sometimes even in the most quiet of ways. Side note, their hair made me think of a lion as well.

In spite of the way things might appear He is present and at work.  But I will not stop asking for mothers and fathers to turn their hearts towards their children.

 After sharing the dream, she added:

Two things that came to mind, you will discern.

1) Years ago I had a dream that inside a church an iron structure was built. People called it an attractive sculpture but the truth was this—is was a wall built to keep the children and adults separated—the Lord was at work in spite of it, but it was not right. 
2) In my mind as well - when you made this a pillar in your church you did not do it by decision - but by revelation, and the certainty that you had time was right, nothing has changed.

There may be things that need to be worked out - but you are more than in the ballpark. Bless you!

The second word of confirmation came in a most unusual way. Dominic (11 years old) had received a very obscene and derogatory message via MSN from a couple of other boys. Considering he was blindsided by the verbal assault, his response showed us some of the good fruit of the Spirit in his heart: patience, not responding in kind, and advocating for others. He acted like the God we’re trying to represent. In walking through the incident with the families involved, I was really blessed to hear the following from one of the moms:

Let me say I am sooooo proud of Domo (tears well up while I type this). He was such a gentle man and handled himself soooo very well. You are raising a great kiddo. He was so composed. Tell him from me that I think he is awesome!

Where did that kind of character come from? Where did he learn that way to respond? It comes from years of watching our community love one another, respond to each other in gentleness, seeing how we relate. It won’t be enough for our children to learn it as information through a lesson. It takes a whole community that lives in counter-cultural ways of love in order to be there for him when I cannot be.

Further, our children will require more than one and a half hours of training a week to prepare them for the twenty-first century. You cannot depend on a Sunday School or a single church service each week to be enough for what they will face. They need to be saturated with it daily when they get up, when you sit around the table, when they go to bed at night. The words and way of Jesus needs to be bound to their foreheads, in their pockets, all over the house.

Deut. 6:4-9

4 Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. 5 Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Deut. 11:18-21

18 Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 19 Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 20 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, 21 so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land that the LORD swore to give your forefathers, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.

Deut. 29:29

The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may follow all the words of this law.

Activation and Closing

Rather than simply learning things at church to take home for application, we want to equip and empower you to bring the children to church ready to offer something here so that they can be more fully integrated into the service.

 

1. At home, as families, let’s find the promises of Jesus and bring them to be shared at church, week after week. He has said to us, “Ask and you will receive.” We want to receive what he has promised. So what has he promised? Let’s find out and bring that to church to share.
2. As families, let’s ask our children what gifts we could bring to the community to share with one another—a word of encouragement, a verse, a picture, a gift. Let the children give these gifts to those whom the Lord directs them.
3. Let’s gather to share our children’s names, why we picked them and what they mean. Then we can pray for families by name and make for many new “child-dedications.”
4. Let’s resolve to bring our children to the communion table every week until the summer, where the real presence of Jesus is experienced and can transform us as we come to the open table by faith.
5. There will be teaching times for the children (the Justice League with Toni and Heather twice per month and Listening Prayer for children with Tracey once per month) ON THE CONDITION that we don’t recreate the segregation of adults and children… that these times equip the children to integrate with us through the rest of the service.

The children each gave gifts to members of the congregation.
Closing songs by the Keulker children.

 

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[1] FRESH WIND CHILDREN (Adult’s Orientation Guide)

At Fresh Wind, the Lord showed us early on that the children were one of the pillars of our church. They are not our target group: Jesus is. But the children are pillars in that they mentor us in the ways of the kingdom. Jesus said, “Unless you become like them, you will not enter the kingdom.”

The Lord wants us to be watchful and attentive of what God is doing in and through the children so that we can all enter into the life of the Kingdom… so much so that a few years ago, the Lord told us that for a season (or several), the children were to be IN the service, rather than out of sight and out of mind. He showed us that if we treat them as a distraction to be removed, we would be like the Pharisees and disciples who pushed them away. Christ said, “Bring them in, noise and all, into the temple courts.”

This is unusual in church life and requires some orientation for parents and other adults. Here are some guidelines we’ve come to as the Lord has trained us to integrate the children into church family life. We’re obviously still learning:

 

1. No shooshing of the children. Shooshing has shut down many of us. And it isn’t really “love.”
2. On the other hand, this is not to say, “Anything goes.” That’s not love either. So we are learning to   exercise some “love-no’s.” Our four love-no’s are: “No pushing out or drowning out God or people.” We ask parents to invite their children (and adults too) to remember to love others who may be trying to hear God or whatever else is happening in the service.

 During the service, when the children are with us, here are some other options:

 

1. There is often a creation station up front with art activities. This is usually opened after the      worship time. We encourage the children to express what God is doing with them through drawing and crafts, and to share these with the congregation whenever they like. We ask older children to help younger ones do this too. Parents are encouraged to help the children get down there, or they   can take the activities back to their seat.
2. We have a play corner in the back where there is often Lego and other toys. Children can bring their own toys, with the guideline that the toys should express creativity and construction. We appreciate if they don’t bring toys that express violence and destruction. This corner is often quite loud, so parents typically need to invite them to remember their inside voices. This usually is received better if we show interest in what they’re making and affirm their activities first. Other adults are welcome to join these children to help out.
3. In the spirit of 1 Cor. 14, children are welcome to share with the congregation any kind of song,      picture, dream, story, scripture verse that they feel would be encouraging. What they show and tell is often the main point of the morning, so we try to be very attentive.
4. Children are welcome to dance or flag or participate on the stage      as well, and they might be reminded and invited to these activities, esp. when the children are in the mood to play tag (a frequent favourite which is the way children remind us that they need an invitation of some sort).
5. Children can be sought out or led to pray for others, especially praying for and serving communion with our special friends who are in wheelchairs, etc.
6. Sometimes, children need a break and its okay for them to take a breather in the hallway, but the    school requires an adult presence. Parents shouldn’t assume that someone else is supervising… please check on that.

Before the service, we recommend that parents discuss with their families what they would like to bring to the service (books, paper, toys… BUT also, words, songs, prayers). Who they would like to see (which friends they want to gather with); how they’d like to participate; and how they plan to worship Jesus this morning. This way, gathering for fellowship, participating in the family; and worshiping God become intentional values.